Love, In All Its Complexity And Beauty


What is love?  How might each of you describe this complex emotion?  This is something I began giving a lot of thought to and suddenly found my pen flying off the paper.  

Love has hundreds of facets and dimensions to it, making this a nearly impossible thing to fully explain or pinpoint with a relatively simple explanation.  To me, love is found not only in the grand gestures but even more so, in the smaller nuanced ones between two people.  Love is a compilation of moments throughout the span of our relationship with that person.

The beginnings of possible love can be found in the fluttering of wings inside your stomach, those initial hours spent together building upon the connection you already feel.  Love can be glimpsed in all its possibility within that first kiss that isn't just a kiss, but a moment that causes a deep physical and emotional movement inside of you.  You know it when you feel it.  Most first kisses aren’t like this.  A few are.

Love can be seen growing in the favorites and preferences one begins to store away in their memory banks about the one they are falling for.  His most loved meal is salmon, his favorite type of candy.  Her favorite sweet is strawberry shortcake, her favorite tea, Jasmine.  Love is giving interest and time towards getting to know the people to whom your love interest is closest.

Love is waking up early and making their eggs just the way they like them.  Or him spending hours of an afternoon patiently in search of the perfect shoes with her.  Or her putting in hours to create a scrapbook of all their memories together.  Love is the swell of happiness you feel when hearing them sigh sweetly in their sleep, or the warmth of their head on your chest.

Love becomes clear when how they look at you changes.  The shift is subtle but there.  The way they begin to touch you more protectively and tenderly.  The warmth and affection visible in their eyes as they look at you, coupled with the sweet knowing smile playing on their lips.

Love is the hand squeeze that´s a secret symbol for something more.  The personal, endearing and laughter-evoking nicknames you unearth for each other along the way.

Love is the act of focusing, listening and choosing to be present and interested.  Even when sometimes this is challenging.  Love is the conversation that continues hours into the night, even when you are exhausted.  It’s all the conversations you've had, built up like a multi-layered cake of stories, feelings and words.

Love is the Christmas gift you painstakingly researched online in the hopes that it will take their breath away.  Love is the heartfelt handwritten card, note, poem or letter.  Its gifts and sentiments that reflect the object of your affections unique personality and passions, as well as your feelings for them.

Love is being curious about their story.  Their past, who they are right now, and what they will become and grow into.  Love is wanting to know them deeply.  And ever striving towards finding new things to discover about them. 

Love is turning towards someone, instead of away.  Love is seeing those traits about them first hand that irk the crap out of you, yet still reveling in their company.  Infatuation is blind, but real love is with eyes wide open.  Seeing and adoring still.  Love isn't just being there when it’s convenient or easy, but about being there when it’s not.  Love is about choosing to confront and push through emotional challenges.  

Love gives priority to maintaining the relationship and connection.  Its meeting their eyes across the room at a party and feeling comforted, overjoyed being with this person.  Like you are sharing your own sweet, special secret in the moment when your eyes lock across the room.  Love is the joy and relaxation you feel with them under the suns warmth, lounging together at the beach.  Or, cuddled together under a cozy blanket during winter time, bodies draped over one another.

Love is sharing your soul with another person.  Love is someone sharing their soul with you.  Love doesn't judge or condemn.  Love doesn't possess or suffocate.  Love is loyal.  Love is fun.  Love is laughter.  Love is giving.  Love is patience.  Love is open.  Love is compromise.  

It´s the surge of emotion stirring in your stomach, the tingling in your limbs as you see them walking towards you after not having seen them for a while.  Love is excitement.  Love is comfort.  Its feeling safe in their arms and in their presence.  Love is seeing all of someone, but focusing on all that you treasure about them.

Love is choosing to run towards someone instead of away.  Yet, love also understands when someone needs space.  

Love is a certain type of kiss.  You can feel the difference behind their lips when love is present.

Love is longing for someone when they’ve gone away for a while.  It’s the ache you feel within your chest when you miss the sound of their laugh, or the warm weight of their hug.  Love can feel helpless, knowing that like any relationship, it may or may not work out and this terrifying you, stomach clenching when considering such a possibility, unable to fathom a life without them in it.  Love refuses to fathom this.
Love is hope.  Love searches for loopholes.

Love can be overwhelming.  It evokes the full spectrum of the strongest emotions known to man.  Anger. Jealousy.  Elation.  Thrill.  Romance.  Devastation.  Desire.  Heartbreak.  Regret.  Fear.  Comfort.  Warmth.  Understanding.  Joy.  Love encompasses the whole gamete of human feeling.

Love is when your story becomes the lyrics of the songs to which you listen.  It’s every person who makes you look twice because they wear the same type of jacket, or have the same style of hair as the one you love.

Love is making plans and discussing dreams.

Its adventure and wonder.  Love is feeling inspired and moved.  Its feeling scared and doing it anyway.  It’s cherishing everything this person has to tell you.  Love is wondering about them before you fall asleep.  It’s the slideshow movie of all the memories and emotions you have together stored away in the keepsake box of your heart.  Its anticipating with bated breath, all that’s to come. 

Love is having reasons to hate someone and yet, choosing to feel the opposite.  Love is complicated.  Its messy and its complex.  Love is being deeply, soul-shatteringly hurt by someone and yet, still feeling unconditional love towards them.

Love is brave.  Love is thoughtful.  Love stumbles and it can fall.  Love challenges and stretches you.  Love forgives.  Love is kind.  Love is growth.

Love is life changing.  It’s unforgettable.  It leaves a permanent imprint on your heart.  Love is not something you forget.  It’s something you want to remember.  Love stands out, with power, vivid color and aching sweetness, against the backdrop of the rest of your life.

Written By Brooke English-Barss

Bio: Brooke is a writer, dreamer, romantic, and passionate pancake lover.  Having spent the last four years adventuring throughout Europe, teaching and writing along the way.  Now finding herself back in New England and yearning to fulfill her dream of becoming a published author.  Gobbling up books weekly and writing daily, with a Bachelor’s degree in Communications and concentrations in health and psychology, her life longing is seeing her own book published and sitting on the shelves of a bookstore.

Websites: -