She Knows Her Eternity

Written By Awilda Perez

Author Bio: Aspiring writer. Hopeless Romantic. Alias: Emilia - Facebook: @awildaperez1113 - Instagram: @awildaxo - Twitter: @AwildaxLuz

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She knows her eternity.
She holds herself back.
So self-aware of her goals, ambitions, flaws.
It should be so simple.
Distracted.
Searching.
She loves to love, just not to love herself.
Her happiness is to support him.
Her happiness is to lift him up, make him feel important, make him feel loved and safe.
Where is her support?
Why doesn't she feel important?
Why is she always so unloved?
A hopeless romantic, who's well...hopeless.
She loves to love, just not to love herself.
Seemingly free-spirited, but her soul weighs heavy.
Brokenhearted.
She always ends up brokenhearted.
Addicted.
She depends on the pain.
She feels the good in it.
It’s transformative.
It’s art.
The uncharted territory every time she's about to embark on a new conquest - it gives her everlasting thrill.
The inevitable tragic endings.
She thinks they're so fucking beautiful.
Poor, broken soul.
She sees the beauty in tragedy.
What’s bad for her heart is good for her art.
She knows her eternity.
She’s choosing herself in choosing him.
Happiness exists in the present form and temporary love is the only love she knows.
She finds the power to transform it, to transcribe it, to share it and to make it last a lifetime.
She’s a moving force, she's alive.
She was made for this.
She was made to show what it's like to feel her pain and to see the beauty of it.
She may feel lonely, but she is not alone.
She is him.
She is her.
She is them.
She is us.
She loves to love, even herself.